Planned Parenthood Defends Selling Fetuses To KFC

Planned Parenthood has defended its decision to sell aborted fetuses to fast-food giant Kentucky Fried Chicken, arguing that simply disposing of the bodies would be a “waste of protein”.

The United States Senate recently failed to defund Planned Parenthood this week, after a highly edited tape showed a potential client trying to purchase stem cells from aborted fetuses through their nationwide clinics.  

Today a new video shows longtime client Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) buying fetuses for use as chicken strips. Released by an anti-abortion group, the tape claims the practice is just the tip of the iceberg.

“The entire fast-food industry is built on aborted fetuses,” says Tom Wyatt of, “Why do you think it tastes so bad?”

Perhaps the person most outraged by today’s revelation is presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee. “You mean I’ve eaten hundreds of thousands of deep fried babies?

“I mean, I’m still going to eat at KFC there but lord have mercy and a side of coleslaw on us all.”

Huckabee demanded a full investigation into the ‘devil’s misdeeds’ of both Planned Parenthood and the fast food chain Kentucky Fried Chicken. “I thought their slogan was ‘finger lickin’ good, not fetus lickin’ good.”

A Bucket Of Parents

With chicken prices soaring over the past 15 years, fast food chains have been on the lookout for cheaper substitutes.

Planned Parenthood representative Lindsay Christie, told the New York Herald-Tribune, “Popeye’s has been a client for years but we thought everyone already knew that. It’s a waste to just throw the fetuses away.

“Low-income citizens need protein too. Not everybody can afford filet mignon and Copper River salmon. Besides, in some cultures, eating a baby gives you eternal youth.”

Colonel Sanders did not respond to our request for comment.

Source: The Daily Currant (satire)